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Tongue in cheek

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Your child comes home on October 31st after a big night of picking up all sorts of candy. You don’t want to encourage this horrible habit of eating candy for days on end so you think, “how can I quickly get rid of this”

After reading all sorts of ideas on line you think the best idea is to let your child pick a few favorites and then set a bowl for the “Halloween fairy” to take away and leave a gift in its place. Only, there is a problem in this plan. Now what do you do with all the candy you have hidden in your closet? I mean, after a day of eating it you realize that you can no longer sacrifice your stomach to this great cause!

What to do? You have 10+ pounds of candy! How will you ever rid yourself of this? No one else wants the candy so you can’t get rid of it. You obviously can’t throw it out in the trash? That would be wasteful of all your neighbors hard earned money they spent in attempts to sugar up your kids. (Ha! Ha! Little do they know you beat them at that game!)

You can’t bring them to work because, too late, every other coworker already did that!

You ponder, you think, you debate…wait! How is it already December! You have been trying to figure this out for over a month!?! Can you stuff it in a turkey? Nope, that would not be good. What to do? Now it’s getting to be December!

You really can’t bring it to work now because all your coworkers will make fun of you for bringing in candy corn when you are supposed to be bringing in candy canes!

You are pondering this while you are sitting in a meeting of your club that is trying to figure out how to “give back” for Christmas. It hits you! Like a big heavy bowling ball!

You jump out of your seat and shout, “LETS STUFF SOME TOILET PAPER TUBES FULL OF CANDY, WRAP THE, IN CHRISTMAS PAPER, AND CALL THEM NEW YEARS EVE POPPERS! Then we can bring them down to the local homeless shelter and give them away to the kids down there for fun…I’ll provide the candy, it will be so much fun!”

The rest of the group, in seeing your eagerness and hearing that you already have the candy, jump right on board!

It’s only taken you two months, but that evil candy is out of your house…and the homeless kids, well they don’t care that they are eating candy corn in January! Right?


Working for a large well known nonprofit, we are the recipients of many donations throughout the year. Some are one time donations (such as “i got a great deal on a bunch of blankets and thought of you”) and others are annual (such boxes and boxes and boxes of Easter eggs). Please don’t take this post the wrong way, I really see the humor in it and appreciate that people think of our kids…sometimes, however, we have to see the humor in things. While we were opening all these poppers filled with candy corn, pumpkin chocolates, and yes, even valentines wrapped tootsie rolls, we had to laugh! I don’t think there was really any disrespect for our clients intended, but think about it, if a friend came to you today with a box of chocolates with happy Halloween written on them, you’d think twice, right?

Yes, our clients do see this…for the most part they just laugh along with us! They are homeless, not stupid!


About Jenni

I'm a happily married, thirty-something, Orthodox Chirstian, San Diegan, child development professions...that's me in a nutshell. But there is so much more to me! Come find out!

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