Tomorrow is the anniversary of my grandma passing. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of her. When I restarted this blog, there were two posts that I didn’t want to lose: this one, and the one of the eulogy I gave for her at the memorial. Today I am reposting this one; tomorrow I will report the eulogy.
Those knitted squares are for a baby blanket. A baby blanket lovingly knitted by my Grandma. They are sitting right now waiting for her to learn how to crochet so she can sew them together. They are for a baby who hasn’t yet been created. A baby that is a dream in my mind for now. A baby that will never meet the person who so lovingly knitted these squares.
These knitted squares will be lovingly sewn together by someone else now.
This fabulous woman and I have had two years together that I thank God for. For the past two years, I have spent nearly every Tuesday night with having dinner, talking, laughing, and just being together. Until August when I got laid off.
I thank God for August because, had I not been laid off, I would never have been able to have full days of adventures with her.
She had been in and out of the hospital so many times in the last year for so many more serious things. I fed her ice chips as she slowly regained consciousness from a very long and extended coma.
I wasn’t sure then if she would be leaving us then…she didn’t.
She stuck around for so much longer…this time, she was admitted for just a routine treatment…I stopped by with my mom Thursday night to see her and she was supposed to come home today…she looked great and, she should have, there really wasn’t anything to be concerned about.
I loved being the one to be there with her and she it with her. I loved spending the day walking the fair with her. We had a blast!
She got me…she really and truly got me and appreciated me and laughed at all my jokes…even the ones that no one else got.
I could tease her and she took it; never got mad or upset, she just smiled and laughed. Oh, and she would tease back.
We had our routines on Tuesday nights. I’d knock on the door and she’d tell me I don’t have to knock…I know, I just do! She’d had dinner ready and waiting. I’d get out the TV trays and set them up, she’d get the dinner served.
We’d sit, eat, talk, and just be together.
Then we’d do dishes together…she’d wash, I’d dry.
I’d fix something on her computer, she’d show me the newest bear she was sewing for someone who had lost a family member through hospice, she’d show me the latest doll clothes she was making for the great-grandchildren, we’d talk, look at pictures, and laugh.
Then, at 7, she’d turn on Judge Judy. Oh we had so much fun laughing at the fools on that show. I’ll never watch the show the same ever again. Sometime during that time, my aunt would call…she’d always forget it was Tuesday until Grandma answered then, remembering, she’d quickly get off the phone and we’d continue laughing.
At 7:56, Judge Judy would be over and I’d leave…usually with something that I didn’t come with (oranges,leftovers from dinner, the occasional kitchen gadget that she had replaced with something new for herself).
We called her Mama…well, most of us…that’s who she was. I don’t know when, but sometime in High School I started calling her grandma…I wanted to be different. I wanted her to know it was me no matter what.
A while back, when The Husband and I were there for dinner, as we were leaving he called her Grandma…she stopped him and told him she was Mama…I had/have to smile because she never corrected me and commented on it as well. She let me be different…she got it!
I thank God that I got laid off. I got to take her to Coronado for the day.
I got to go with her to Barona, go to the movies, have lunch at her favorite restaurant, and go to the fair (although that was before I got laid off, but it was in that same time frame.
I am so glad for all the memories I have with her. She was there with me when I went to my first Homecoming. She made all but one of my dresses for all my high school dances.
She was a sewer, a knitter, a crafter, and just so talented. She came to my dance recitals, loved to watch ice skating, and loved to watch Dancing with the Stars. I have great memories of her to take me through the rest of my life…
It’s not those memories that make me sad that she’s not here…it’s the ones that she won’t be here for. I’m sad because she won’t be there to see my babies wrapped in the blanket that she lovingly knitted for them. I’m going to miss that…
She was a GREAT Grandma…and I am blessed that I got to make so many memories with her.